Fun with Delirium

Everyone needs time to shut down their engines, recharge their batteries, and get back to neutral. Unfortunately, as we all know, this is rarely possible for a new mom. "Sleep when the baby sleeps" they all say, as if there is nothing else that needs to be done when the little eating/pooping machine that you gaze at lovingly finally decides to close his eyes. The problem with not following this advice, however, is that you can start sounding like a maniac. Andy got up to go to the bathroom last night, and when he returned, I cautioned him to be careful to not hurt the baby...it went something like this:

J: Careful, don't lay on him!
A: What? Where is he?
J: He's here in bed!
A: What? I didn't know he was in bed with us! When did you bring him in here?
J: What?
A: When did you do that? Wait, where is he? I don't see him!
J: He's right here! (pointing to the space between our pillows) Please be careful! You're leaning on him!
A: What are you talking about?
J: Where is he?
A: Joy, I think he is in his crib. Did you bring him in here?
J: No, someone else did.
A: Ok. Goodnight.

I then rolled over and crashed again until morning. On his way to work, Andy asked me if I remembered what had happened last night, and we about peed our pants reliving it..."There's your blog," he said.